How to support children’s self confidence and self esteem in schools

Children who have high self esteem tend to try new things, make plenty of friends  and find challenges exciting, all because they have belief in their abilities. Whereas children with low self esteem tend to avoid new things, find it hard to make friends and find new challenges daunting, all because their mind is telling them that they don’t have it in them to achieve and they’re too focused on making mistakes. 

It may seem hard to believe the mind can have such control over so many physical aspects of our lives, but if the mind is telling you “nope, I can’t do that”, then you’re setting yourself up to fail. So to combat this, The West Finchley Preschool is here to help you identify your child’s confidence and self esteem levels so that you can quickly nip these negative feelings in the bud and bring out some positive ones. 

We’ve also put together some things you can do to help your child positively raise their confidence and self esteem, read on for more!

Identify what self esteem looks like in children

Most children will go through phases where their self esteem is particularly high and particularly low, but often it will fluctuate between the two and that can be affected by so many environmental factors. If you’re worried that your child’s self esteem has been low for a while, we have put together a couple of lists of what the two ends of the spectrum looks like so that you can get a better feel for the signs. 

High self esteem in children looks like:

  • Happy to say good things about themselves
  • Dares to try something different
  • Making friends is simple
  • Being with others is good fun
  • Change isn’t so scary
  • Mistakes are fine, they’ll try again later
  • Proud of the work they do

Low self esteem in children looks like:

  • Doesn’t have many good things to say about themselves
  • Making friends is hard 
  • Sitting alone rather than sitting with other children
  • Failure is difficult and deters them
  • New experiences are daunting to them
  • Compares themselves to others
  • Doesn’t speak up and shys away

Don’t worry if your child’s confidence and self esteem falls into the latter list, there are plenty of things you can do to support them through this difficult time.

Ways to boost confidence and self esteem in children

If you feel that your child identifies with the low self esteem list, do not worry. Here are some things you can do to help raise their confidence and self esteem so that they can feel better about themselves when they’re at home, school or a playdate. 

Give children chores

At home, set up a star chart, where your child can achieve a star each day for doing a task that you set for them. It can be something as simple as putting their toys away in their toy box, but the idea is to gradually give them more complex responsibilities. Once they’ve managed to achieve a week’s worth of stars, it might be time to give them a new chore to tackle. By this time, your child can look at their chart to see that they’re capable of getting another week’s worth of stars which will give them the confidence to try something new and work towards another goal. 

Avoid negative criticisms 

Everyone makes mistakes, but knowing how to communicate this to a child is important. A child who doesn’t do well in something needs to be supported by encouragement rather than being told that what they have done isn’t good enough. For example, saying to a child that it takes time to be good at something and that practice makes perfect is a good way of telling them to keep at it and to not be disheartened by the results. It might also be the case that you can show them how to do something so that they have a reference to work with. Doing an activity together can help to boost your child’s confidence and self esteem because they know that they’re not doing it alone. 

Encourage socialising

A good way to get your child socialising is by taking them to a preschool. Preschools are full of children of a similar age, new toys and new environments, which lends itself to making friends through sharing, taking turns and playing. Children that have been socialised early on tend to find communicating and making friends much easier than those who wait to start primary school. 

Talk through worries

If your child seems quieter than usual, get them to talk about how they’re feeling. It might be the case that you’re able to relate to their worries and offer them emotional support. Helping them to understand that they’re not alone makes worries feel much more manageable, and putting steps into place to help them overcome their worries is even better.

Contact The West Finchley Preschool

At The West Finchley Preschool, we’re passionate about providing excellent child care and preschool education which is why we boast a number of activities to help your child find where their interests and talents lie. With art, technology, science and discovery activities, just to name a few, you can put your trust in us to provide well-rounded support that will keep your child exploring, discovering, creating and learning. 

Feel free to take a virtual tour of The West Finchley Preschool and if you would like to visit in-person with your little one, please call to make an appointment (020 3613 2597) or fill out our enquiry form and we’ll be right with you. 

We hope you found this blog useful. We regularly update our blogs, so keep checking back to see the latest advice in child care and child education.